With Obama Administration’s approval to house terrorist suspects now held in Guantánamo Bay in a rural Illinois prison, the right-wingnut weeping and wailing, muxing and bruxing is keeping them hooked on Ambien. What if the terrorist suspects escape and infiltrate or take over the bucolic village of Thompson, IL where the now-empty hi-security prison stands? What if terrorist buddies move to Thompson to be closer to their incarcerated buddies? Will the terrorist suspects be granted conjugal rights…with a local girl or boy they fall in love with during a Christian-like compassion visit and then get married? Will they be allowed to Twitter? Damn, so many things could go wrong that could lead to decreased American security. One major safeguard the residents of Thompson could employ would be to remove all monkey bars from public playgrounds and backyards. As we all know, there is nothing a terrorist suspect would like better than to escape and head to the closest set of monkey bars in order to get back in shape for further terrorist acts. Monkey bars… Get rid of ’em.