Startled yet ecstatic fans at last night’s Lady Gaga Monsters Ball concert reveled in the pop star’s ultimate pop performance after she wielded two Uzi submachine guns spraying them in lethal flesh-tearing, blood splattering gun fire. Authorities have identified at least 134 fans dead and more than 200 seriously injured.
The pop music sensation, famous for her performance art concerts aimed to de-construct “fame,” rewarded her gasping audience during the second screamed-induced encore when she reached up inside a large basket-weave bidet atop her blond spray-starched (Niagara Professional Finish Original Spray Starch) hair styled in a nimbus of multiple pulsating phallic spikes surrounding the basket bidet, and yanked the two Uzi’s with professionally-practiced ease, aiming them at her enthralled fans.
“I was expecting the usual LED flashes of electricity and the fake machine-gun sounds,” said one happy fan. “But, wow, then she unloaded the real shit…my girlfriend’s head was blown away…I can still hear Lady Gaga screaming, “I’m a free bitch…I’m a free bitch.”….frigging awesome, man!”
In a post-concert interview, The Lady asked, “Did I look sexy…did I look very sexy?”
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