Stink Like A Rock Star

So dudes, you're pretty hot on Guitar Hero…can even crank some sick air guitar? What's missing?….beyond real musical talent, a Wilco-like backup band, a big recording contract and arenas full of fans waving iPhone cigarette lighters and swarms of backstage pre-moistened nubile groupies?

I'll tell you what's missing: you don't SMELL like a rock star, dumbshit !

Well now you can exude Nine Inch Nails, the aroma of Aerosmith, spray on a tang of Tool, a boquet of Black Sabbath, be redolent of Rage ATM, be stenchy of Sex Pistols and even achieve a wiff of Weezer.

All by just buying fashion designer John Varvatros' new perfume for men, “Rocker Volumn One” (other “volumns” on the way?). The new manfume, which comes in a “flacon” instead of a bottle, (a flacon is a flask or bottle, illiterate nitwit) purports to evoke a “heavy metal rock'n' roll vibe.”

It's all in the nose. Now get rockin', fool.

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