What the Pundits Won’t Say

Let’s be frank here. Media pundits are all over themselves and each other with deep questions and analysis concerning why so many Republicans, considered as potential candidates, are checking into the Republican roach motel and checking out as soon as they can. O my gosh, they gush, Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour decides he doesn’t have enough fire in his belly to mount a campaign. With a belly as big as Barbour’s maybe it was the belly and not the dying embers that told him he’d never get elected. Old, White and fat. Not a good prescription for victory. Well, what about Indiana Governor Mitch Daniels? Says his wife put the kibosh on a run. Or was it the fact that Daniels is about 5’6″ inches tall giving him diminutive chances of actually being elected. Taller candidate always wins, especially when the gap is this large. Ok, Donald Trump. The Hair. Need we say more? Ok, he’s fat, too. Then there’s Newt. Come on. Although Obama got elected despite his first name, does America really want a President Newt? And, of course, he’s obese and funny looking. I’m not saying it’s right that a potential candidate be judged by his/her looks, body mass index, stature or hairstyle, but that’s really the way it is in America folks. In this society, ever so hooked on youth, beauty, abs, jawlines, T’s and A’s it’s a fact of life that perhaps even the physically flawed candidates realize before the voters get a chance to see and judge them waddling, holding down hairpieces, huffing’ and puffin’ and stepping up on podium boosters on the proverbial campaign trail, path, track or route. Prediction for Republican 2010 ticket: Mitt Romney and Texas Gov. Rick Perry. Remember Massachusetts Kennedy and Texas LBJ? 

Author: Lawrence Rudmann

Multi-genre comedic political poet and trender/periscoper of what's around the corner. Avid tennis player and ukulele strummer. Comedic poetry stimulator and healer.

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