Future Hagee Harangues – Vol. 1

God planned for food prices to rise world-wide to correct the problem of childhood obesity in the United States.

God planned for America’s children to become obese so that parents could better accept God’s plan for rising food prices.

God smited the people of Myanmar with a cyclone as punishment for changing their country’s name from Burma.

God vented his wrath on the Chinese people by recently shaking the earth killing and injuring thousands as punishment for painting Thomas the Tank toys with lead paint.

God planned for Joe Lieberman not to become VP with Gore so he would later be able to describe me (Rev. Hagee) as “an Ish Elschim..a man of god.”

God planned for Joe Lieberman to defend my statement that God sent Hitler to help Jews reach the promised land as proof that he really does belong in the Republican Party.

Gawd.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s